My mother, green tea, and the Chinese Communist Party

Upon going to college I realized a lot of habits I had taken for granted as being normal was actually only true for the bizarre family environment I grew up in. Apparently normal people do take showers and that the showerhead isn’t just for decoration and poor urban households that couldn’t afford a bathtub. Apparently normal people don’t eat the unfortunate animals that decide to winter on your front lawn. Apparently normal people don’t go eeling on the weekends. And apparently normal mothers don’t drink an average of 4 teapots of green tea a day. I didn’t drink tea or coffee growing up, so I always shrugged it off as an adult thing. But after one of our first family vacations, I realized that normal families usually lugged around a camera instead of a portable tea container complete with shoulder strap and tea leaf filter.

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Uh… how do you store YOUR tea?

Y’mean not everyone keeps them in empty pork fu containers?

Pork Fu

When to pop the tea question?

Happy lunar new year! Xin nian kuai le, gong xi fa cai, etc, etc. I have to confess — I am pretty terrible at being chinese (unless I’m awesome at being chinese, like… when getting food freebies in Costco). I decided I wanted a small little Chinese new year get-together chez moi and I ended up having to call my mother…

Me: “Mommy? What do chinese people eat on chinese new year?”
*Mother audibly signs* (some things you can only ask mothers)

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Trader Joe’s Tea Roundup

Moved to

Holy visions

If the Virgin Mary can appear on toast, can the Flying Spaghetti Monster appear in a glass of Arizona iced green tea? And if it did, how do I manage to preserve it for 10 years till I can sell it on eBay for $28k?